Posts Tagged ‘Allah’

Bismillah,

I just wanted to start out by saying barakallahu feekum for all the kind words and du’as I’ve received. I see them all and I am not replying on purpose because I have to get this off of my chest.  I don’t want to be distracted by the finer details or lengthy side explanations before I have just let it all out of my system. I’ve always been a private person, never discussing my private life, my marriage or what goes on with my family with others.  When I found this blog, I saw an opportunity to vent about those things that weighed heavily on my conscience, my struggles, my problems, without dishonoring my husband or my loved ones. 

I never had anyone I could discuss this issue with.  I always felt that people would be judgemental or look down on him for being flawed or me for being shallow and impatient. It has gone on too long and now  and I feel like shaitan has me confused.  I feel like the lone sheep left to the marauding wolf.  I feel safe here amongst anonymous friends.  Safe enough to bring things I feel to the light and get the perspective I need to move forward.  Like polygyny, I’m sure I’m not the only one who has been through or is going through this.  Maybe my affair will give someone else the courage to face reality and get help.  I pray for the good and Allah’s guidance for us all.

Khayr Insha’allah

 

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I don’t know how long I’ve known or how long I’ve pretended not to know the truth. It always lay underneath my thoughts, purposely shoved to the side, shoved down, away from my conscious mind. I just did not want to deal with what the truth could mean. To me and the family I’ve worked so hard to build and support. The truth is I’ve always known the truth. 

The truth is, my husband is mentally ill and it’s a problem that I’m not sure I can deal with anymore.  His illness has not been named or diagnosed and there are no medications or therapy sessions.  But it’s true and I have to come to terms with this reality.  There, I’ve said it.  It has been released from my heart and into the stratosphere and I don’t know what to do or say next.

Khayr, Insha’allah

I am finding myself in another fight.  A war I have fought for a long time, but refused to thnk of the enemy as a real enemy.  It feels like I’ve been running as fast as  can but I only swing a few punches when I’m cornered, when I am caught, when I am forced to defend long enough to run again, to escape again.  But noone can win a battle using this technique.  The enemy, the foe must be recognized, analyzed.  The lines of defense must be clearly drawn and a firm stance must be taken.  The enemy has to be faced head on, man to man, fist to fist and gun to gun.  Am I strong enough??  Will I surrender.  Must I lose or can I win.  Pray for me…. I need all the help I can get.

Khayr Insha’allah

Mourning….

Posted: May 9, 2009 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

muslim map1

Bosnia

Chechnya

Palestine

Iraq

Somalia

Sudan

West Africa

Afganistan

Pakistan

 

Who’s Next?

What’s Left?

In ‘al-Fawa’id’ (p. 196-199), Ibn al-Qayyim said

Manners have limits. When these limits are crossed, this is
transgression. When they are fallen short of, this is deficiency and
disgrace.

Anger has a limit: and it is to be bold while being above having negative and deficient traits, and this is the perfect form of anger. If this limit is exceeded, you become a transgressor. If you fall short of it, you will be a coward and will not be able to raise yourself above negative traits.

Covetousness has a limit: it is to take all you need from this world and what it has to offer you. When you fall short of this limit, it becomes disgrace and wastefulness. When you exceed this limit, you end up wanting what you shouldn’t want.

Envy has a limit: and it is to compete in becoming perfect and to excel such that your rival is unable to excel over you. When this limit is exceeded, you transgress and oppress in which you wish that the good things are taken away from the one you envy and are keen to harm him. When you fall short of this limit, you become low, weak in aspiration, and you belittle yourself. 

The Prophet said: “There should be no envy except in regards to two things: a man who was granted wealth by Allah and he was able to spend it for the sake of the truth, and a man who was granted wisdom by Allah and he takes it and teaches it to the people.”
So, this is an envy of competition, where the envious one pushes
himself to be like the one he envies without wishing that he is
deprived of the good things that are with him.

Sexual desire has a limit: and it is to relax the heart and mind from the exhaustion of worship, to maintain moral excellence, and to use the fulfillment of these desires to help you in this. When you exceed this limit, you fall into being overly lustful, and you come to resemble animals. When you fall short of this limit and don’t use this time to obtain excellence and virtue, this becomes weakness, inability, and disgrace.

Relaxation has a limit: and it is to collect yourself and your strength to prepare for worship and perfection of the self, and to save this so that you don’t become weak or tired. When you exceed this limit, this becomes laziness and waste, and you end up missing out on so many things that could benefit you. When you fall short of this limit, you end up hurting and weakening your energy, and it might even be cut off from you like a farmer who is unable to land to plow or crops to pick.

Generosity has a limit between two extremes: and whenever this limit is exceeded, this becomes wastefulness and extravagance. When you fall short of this limit, you become cheap and miserly.

Bravery has a limit: and when you cross this limit, you become reckless. When you fall short of this limit, you become a coward. This limit is that you put yourself forth when the time is right to do so and that you hold yourself back when the time is right to do so, just like Mu’awiyah said to ‘Amr bin al-‘As: “I don’t know whether you’re brave or cowardly! You go forth to the point that I say you’re the bravest person, and then you stay back to the point that I say you’re the most cowardly person!” So, he replied:

I am brave if I am guaranteed the chance * If I don’t have the chance, I am a coward…

Protective jealousy has a limit: and if you exceed this limit, you fall into accusation and suspicion of the innocent. If you fall short of this limit, you fall into heedlessness and lack of manhood.

Humility has a limit: and if it is crossed, this becomes humiliation and disgrace. If you fall short of it, you deviate to arrogance and false pride.

Honor has a limit: and if you exceed it, you fall into arrogance and blameworthy traits. If you fall short of it, you deviate to humiliation and disgrace. The basic principle in all this is to choose the path of moderation between excess and negligence. This is what all of the benefits of this world and the next are built upon. In fact, you can benefit your body in no other way, because when some of your activities are done with lack of moderation and either exceed or fall short of it, your body’s health and energy begins to decline accordingly. Likewise, natural activities such as sleeping, staying awake, eating, drinking, having intercourse, playing sports, spending time alone, spending time with others, etc. – if these are all done moderately between the two blameworthy extremes, this is justice. If you deviate to either extreme, this is a sign of deficiency and will lead to even more deficiency.

This knowledge of proper limits is from the best types of knowledge, especially the limits of what is commanded and prohibited. The most knowledgeable people are those who know the most about these limits, such that they don’t put in them what doesn’t belong and don’t remove from them what does belong. Allah Said: {“The bedouins are the worst in disbelief and hypocrisy, and more likely to be ignorant of the limits that Allah has revealed to His Messenger… “} [at-Tawbah; 97]

So, the people who are most just are those who recognize by way of
knowledge and action the legislated limits in their manners and deeds,
and Allah is the source of success…”

Wa Billahi Tafeeq….

It’s been a long time since I have made an update here.  I’ve been sifting through new feelings, new events and even pondered starting a new blog… pondering doing something new.

But I realised, this is all me.  All my experiences. Nothing new at all really. So on that note.  Here’s with new with me and my crew.

My husband is scared of polygyny.  He was so disappointed by the turn of events in the last episode, he is having a hard time trusting another situation.  He (we) put so much into it, only to have it fail…fast.  I persuaded him to have another sitdown, but he sabotaged it on purpose…. lololol.  He highlighted  all of his bad points. So we have agreed to not discuss it.

I am slowy getting over my anger at world events. I’m still angry about it but I believe I have found some balance and comfort in the knowledge that Allah is in control and we are his slaves and he does with us as he pleases. I find comfort in the knowledge that the lives lost are not in vain Allah tells us in his book of truth and guidance:

 O ye who believe! seek help with patient perseverance and prayer; for Allah is with those who patiently persevere And say not of those who are slain in the way of Allah. “They are dead.” Nay, they are living, though ye perceive (it) not. Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere, Who say, when afflicted with calamity: “To Allah We belong, and to Him is our return”:- They are those on whom (Descend) blessings from Allah, and Mercy, and they are the ones that receive guidance.  Surah Baqarah 153-157.

So masha’allah. I am content with what he has decreed for us. For our ummah, and I patiently wait saying “ina’lillahi wa ina’illayhi rajiun”.

New topics to be discussed: Hijrah, Make-up and Marriage bi’ithnillah.

Khayr Insha’allah

Ques 1. Why is there no Khalifah after all these years and why are no steps being taken to get one?

Ques 2. How can the largest, richest reiligion (beside the vatican people) not have an army or any means to help the nation of muslims out of the many global crisises it has been afflicted with.

Ques 3. Why were foriegn powers allowed to build a military presence in all the key areas of the islamic world like a game of chess gone terribly wrong?

Ques 4. How many muslims have to die before something is done?

Ques 5. When the meccans gathered to massacre the Prophet and his companions, did Allah command him to sit quietly and make du’a?

Ques 6. How can they sit in their palaces and on their yachts and watch the carnage, without witholding ONE barrel of oil or expelling ONE diplomatic presence of those at fault from their countries or closing down one military supply route that they gave permission to come through Muslim land to feed foreign soldiers and make sure they have enough fire-power to kill us all?

Ques 7. When will the sleeping giant awake?